What a beautiful day today with my family walking the woods at Radnor Lake.   I asked God this morning to show Himself to me today and also give me the eyes to see.  And boy did He.  He showed Himself to me while browsing all the beautiful pumpkins, vegetables and fruit at the Farmers Market.  He showed Himself to me in moments of silence af Radnor Lake, the noise of the birds and squirrels in the woods and  hugely through the occasional bickering and MANY moments of family gut-laughing.

I count my blessings today.   I may be living in a cramped apartment, missing teaching women's Bible classes and working with Youth, and lonely for new friendships, but I am so incredibly blessed by my God.  He shows Himself to me if only I choose to see Him.  No matter what the circumstances.  

Settled?  Well, yes in the physical sort of way.   Mentally and emotionally, um....almost.   We are getting there.   This move worked out so perfectly and was smooth in so many aspects, yet I feel an underlying current of "disconnect" and a sense of not quite knowing where we belong.   God is working mightily, yet I still am a little "out of sorts".   I am sure this is normal, yet want to feel rooted.   Yet, being rooted takes much time and that is something we have not had yet.   But, it will come.   We will root and we will grow and with God's grace we will thrive here.

"He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green. It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."   Jeremiah 17:8

I was at a ministry luncheon meeting yesterday afternoon and an older pastor there told me to try something out.  He asked me to pull out a measuring tape to full length and plot out where I was on the tape in regards to my age with the end of the tape being the end of my life.  He uses this technique to encourage people to see how much longer they may have left to live; and, therefore, to encourage them to GET ON IT.   Do what God has called you to do.  Don't hesitate!

I must admit that I came home and tried it out.  After I got over the initial shock, it really did encourage me to LIVE.   Try it out - see what you think.  ;)

It's Football Time in Tennessee

This time of year always does, and always will, remind me of my brother.   Some of my most favorite memories are watching UT games with him or talking "play-by-play" with him over the phone during the games.   I know if God gives us our favorite-colored mansion in heaven, that Jeff's is orange.

Here's to another season of Volunteer football and to the fourth football season without my brother.  Here's to singing "Good 'ole Rocky Top" and here's to another season of growing past the grief and growing deeper and deeper spiritually.

And here's to you Jeff - It's Football Time in Tennessee!  And "give. them. six.!"

James Franklin Shields, Jr.

So, this weekend I realized I have to go back......

back to these precious children who touched my family's heart so much!

Pine Ridge 2010 - click here.  :)

Life is Good!

Quick update from the Brown House -

Love my job!  Getting paid to help feed and clothe people everyday is pretty darn cool.  :)

Kids are adjusting VERY well to school and new area.  They miss their friends back home, but I think they love being back in Nashville very much.

Apartment life is very challenging but also very simplifying.   I have definitely learned to use space to the best of my ability and its potential.  :/

Chris - working hard as usual - I am blessed.

Melissa - so happy to be back near family and longing to meet some new friends and foster some intentional Christian community.  Blessed to be part of Crosspoint North!

Chris and Melissa - started Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace and are on week 2.  Trying to save $1000 as quickly as possible for our emergency fund.  

Oh, yeah and we got finally got a Mac - see pic below!  :)

She deserves a second chance? Come on!!!

Just like many followers of POTSC I felt a little "uncomfortable" about the new campaign poster of Casey Anthony.

It brought out feelings that I did not know how to deal with.   I mean, I am the queen of needing forgiveness, grace, and second chances, but HER?  Really?  She deserved it too?   No way.......she killed her child, right?

So, just like many others, I have battled through many different feelings this week.   Did I deserve a second chance when I wasted my parents money and failed out of college the first year?  Did I deserve a second chance when I made horrid decisions during my college years?   Did I deserve a second chance when I failed miserably at my marriage?   Of course, I did!  Because I was "me" - and "I" always deserve a second chance, right?  "We" always deserve second chances, but "those people" who do really bad things, um, not so much.

My brain numbed......I had a hard time figuring this out.  I love Jesus.  I was saved at age 8.  I have done missionary work and helped out in many different ministries.  Good grief, in my job right now I love people at their worst and try and help them get back on their feet, but Casey Anthony.   Hmmm.......

I searched the Scriptures and that is what I would encourage you to do also.   Dig deep within yourself and listen to Jesus' words.  NO one is beyond a second chance and that doesn't mean just "me" and "you".  That means EVERYONE - all God's Children.   So, if the new POTSC campaign offends you or makes you angry inside, then GOOD - that's the point.   Search yourself.  Search the Scriptures and most of all remember how many second chances you have had.   Most of all, the hardest part, is remembering that Christ did not just die for you.  He died for us all, even Casey if she receives Him.

For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast.  Ephesians 2: 8-9

Ending A Chapter

Tomorrow we travel back down to Winchester to empty out the last belongings and close on our house.  I am excited to get it done and close that chapter of our lives and move onto the next.  We were so blessed to meet so many wonderful people in Winchester, but now that we are here we know that we are beginning another new and exciting chapter of our lives.   When we moved to Winchester, our marriage was completely in the dumps and we were both mentally and emotionally exhausted from many situations we had gone through.   Looking back, I can see how our time in Winchester both gave us some time of healing and also some time of battling through issues as a couple.  It also gave us the opportunity to minister to those in need in South Dakota and minister to Youth within our church.   It gave me time to learn that I really needed to show Christ's love to Chris no matter how wrong I felt he was or how right I thought I was.   I also needed to come to a point of surrendering our marriage and family to God.   Lots of Christians think they "surrender", but when it comes down to it, I don't believe many of us truly have.   True surrender involves humility and brokenness.    Our Christian life is a journey, but I can see now that he had us in a place during these past 6 years to teach us some pretty deep stuff and now we are ready to move on.   We are a little stronger and ready to be more and more radically devoted to Christ.   We struggle, but we keep moving on.

Our pastor today spoke about being a "fan" of Jesus or being a "follower" of Jesus.   Being a fan involves being "religious" and "legalistic" while being a true follower of Jesus involves being transformed daily into a closer image of Christ.    My prayer is that I keep journeying on trying to become more like Him.   My prayer for you is the same.   He has us all at different places for different reasons - just don't quit journeying on.

What more?

We knew God was up to something months big before we made our move back to Nashville.  You know that feeling?  That anxious, exciting feeling that He is working, but you just don't know what He is up to?  Well, I had that "gut" feeling for about a year before we moved, but just didn't know where He was leading us.   And now here I sit.  Here in my little apartment north of Nashville.  Here where He led us.  Here I sit with a job that God literally handed to me (thanks to some pastors from Cross Point being open to God's leading).  We know we are where we are supposed to be, yet I still feel that nudge - that "gut" feeling that He is up to more.   And quite honestly, I don't have time for that right now Lord.   I have a new challenging job and three teenagers who are transitioning into a new school system and have left all their closest friends.   I have a husband who travels, meals to cook, bills to pay and a Dad to help get moved up this way.   Yet, I still feel Him calling.  I hear Him saying "you are almost there, My child, but not quite yet."   So, here I am.   Listening.  Wanting to know what more it is He wants from me.  Is it my life story He wants me to share?   Is it our marriage story He wants me to share?   Is it a ministry He wants me involved in?   I just don't know.  So here I sit.  Here in my little apartment north of Nashville.   Listening.....

Settling

The last week has been a complete and total blur.  Seriously.  We have had a ton of things to accomplish before school starts and I begin my job tomorrow, and thankfully I "think" we are ready.  

God has been good to us.   We were blessed a welcoming meal the first night here at our apartment, things went smoothly with the transition into the apartment, and registration for the kids at school went off without a hitch.   Of course, there have been challenges with our mail being forwarded and some banking issues, but  nothing to complain about in comparison to the blessings we have received this week.  We feel at peace.  We feel at home.  We feel closer as a family and we feel "lighter".  

I am sure there will be days of feeling homesick and days full of challenges, but overall we feel sure God called us here and can't wait to meet new people, make new friends and see what all He has in store for our family!