I don't really understand myself, for I want to what is right, but I don't do it. Instead, I do what I hate.
This is a verse I have ruminated on quite a bit throughout the course of my life. It convicts and haunts me because I feel like much of my life has been spent living out this verse. I wonder quite often what it could have been Paul did that he hated. I know the things I do that I hate - getting aggravated and yelling at my children, time spent resenting my husband for all his time on the road, taking steps backwards in my faith when all I want to do is take steps forward. Then there are things like becoming impatient with people at work or impatient when people's conversations take longer than I want them too. The problem is this, these seemingly small things end up breeding bigger things. Trust me.
This is why it is so important to daily take our junk to the cross. Take it there and leave it there. It seems lately that I have been wanting to hang on to my junk and I HATE when I get to that point. I hate when I get to the point that I think my junk it too much for Jesus. Do you have junk you think is too much for Jesus? I know I do. But, reality my friend is this. Nothing is too big for our Saviour! Cry out to Him. Find someone to share your burden with. He loves you and cares for you. This I know.
